How to Train Your Common House Pet
by nedandchuck
Summary: Modern college AU. Hiccup Haddock runs a school for troubled pet owners. His dad isn't exactly thrilled at the idea of the family business falling out of the family. They have a strict deal, but can Hiccup fulfill his end of the bargain?
1. Chapter 1

Astrid Hofferson was a proud girl. She was stronger than the rest of her classmates, very athletic, smart, pretty, and very, very stubborn. Thus it annoyed her to no end when the parakeet she finally worked up the will to purchase was the most strong-headed creature she had ever met.

The bird, though she was it was perfectly obedient, thought itself the ruler over her home the second she released it into her apartment. Astrid dubbed the bird Stormfly, to which it took kindly, the blonde supposed, she would tell her guests, that it repeated the name relentlessly well into the night.

The bird's owner worked as a barista in a coffee shop below her apartment, where the manager was kind enough to let her keep the bird in the shop during her shifts, so long as Stormfly was kept in the decent sized birdcage she had brought the animal home in.

Astrid's friend, whose birth name as Rayya, but much preferred Ray, sat sipping from a tall glass as the barista moaned about her naughty parakeet, glaring at the bird as it preened itself proudly before a cooing audience.

"Taylor and I took Barf and Belch to a specialist." Ray informed her friend pointedly, referring to her twin brother and their Siamese kittens. "It took a couple of classes until the guy stopped humming the song from Lady and the Tramp, but the guys barely live up to their names anymore!" She chewed her straw. "He's really good."

"Right." Astrid scoffed. I can afford to pay someone to tell me that my bird is stupid. I don't have any support from my parents, remember, rich girl?"

Ray grinned at the bitter endearment. "My parents would be happy to pay for it!" she offered.

Astrid didn't often accept money she didn't work for, but this bird was driving her to the edge.

**XxX**

In a week, Ray had arrange for Astrid to join the Dragon Academy. She has expected the teacher to give individual classes, but Ray informed her otherwise.

The twins drove her to a small building that looked worn out and misplaced between the between the taller buildings in their city. She hummed with interest as they excitedly led her in and wove their way into a gymnasium-szed room.

A boy who couldn't have been more than a couple of years older than her lit up when the trio entered. His green eyes sparkled as he kept from his seat on the floor, a black cat spilling when he did so.

"Hello!" He nodded politely, lifting one foot as the cat who earlier occupied his lap circled the other. "I'm Hiccup. I run this not-exactly-fine establishment. Astrid, right?"

The blonde raised an eyebrow at him, shifting Stormfly's cage to her left hand so she could extend her right. "Yeah, Hofferson." He shook her hand with an awkward grin and she held up the cage, "This is Stormfly." The instructor unlatched the door, setting the bird free.

"This," He returned, scooping up the less than satisfied cat who begged for attention at his feet. "Is Toothless. He was a stray. I call him Toothless because some..." Astrid could tell he was biting back a profanity by the way he halted the sentence and hesitated. "One filed his teeth. His hind leg is a prosthetic. We match." The boy finished with a mischievous grin, holding out both his right foot and his cat's.

The bird owner tried not to gasp at the makeshift foot he boasted, but didn't resist snapping her fingers in revaluation. "You're Haddock! We take some classes together." he nodded shyly.

"Into to Business, Mathematics 102, and History of Equality." the brunette's smile turned sheepish.

Before she could respond, he clapped his hands together. "So! You guys know the drill!" He flashed a more confident grin at Astrid as the others loudly made their war to the center of the room. "This is where we sit in a circle like a group of kindergarteners."

"Ah," she replied eloquently. "I see."

Hiccup sat in a metal chair as his pupils took their places in the surrounding mismatch ones. The boy extended both his legs and placed his palms on the chair between them.  
So, you guys," the instructor addressed two young men Astrid hadn't noticed before. "This is our newest maybe-member. Her name is Astrid Hofferson, and her bird's name is..." he glanced quickly at a clipboard with the sheet Ray had her fill out. "Stormfly, sorry. Astrid, this is Scott Jorgenson and his dog, Fang," he gestured to a fit brunette who wouldn't stop winking and his reddish inbred dog. "And Fisher Ingerman and his turtle, Meatlaug." The next boy he pointed at was a stout, shy blond with a turtle snug on his lap.

"Hello," Astrid greeted, her bird squawking after her as though to repeat the sentiment.

In return she received two variations of, "Hi.". A low, flirtatious one that made her blush merely because of the effort she made to hold back laughter, and a meek one that was drowned out by Fang's barking.

Hiccup whistled to the dog and gave him a firm order to sit. "Right, then, first off: who's got questions?"

**XxX**

The lessons went by quickly. Astrid hadn't expected them to be so lighthearted and fun.

In the end, Ray announced that she and the resident bird owner would be going to a bar, after dropping off their pets at home, inviting the others as well.

"I have class," Scott said reluctantly, and Fisher nodded, admitting he was busy with school as well.

After looking shyly at his students, Hiccup smiled slightly. "I'm free." He offered, tossing his backpack over one shoulder.

"Cool," Ray stuck up one thumb and smacked her brother in the head with an empty cat kennel.

"I have to go put Toothless in m room, be right back." The boy smiled worriedly at the twins as they wrestled to the ground before jogging with his cat into the next room.

"Fisher," Astrid called the blond aside as he passed her. "Hiccup lives here?"

Fisher shrugged. "Yeah. It's a dump, but I heard he left his dad's house before he finished high school. He's lived here ever since."

Ray popped up from the ground, where her brother was being sat upon by their kittens, and leaned on Fisher, who flushed at the contact. "Yeah, Hiccup's back story could be the theme of some melodramatic movie." she rolled her eyes. "Cry me a river. It's not like he moans about it all the time, or like he's upset about it. All he complains about is living in this dump."

"I think it's strong of him." Fisher interjected, "It's probably hard to live on your own when you're seventeen."

"You're just soft." Ray scoffed and linked arms with Astrid, shouting, "Cat whisperer! If you don't hurry it along, we're gonna leave without you!" and shooing Fisher to his classes.

Astrid thought about what the blond had said and felt bad for their instructor.

**That's not too bad of a place to end it, right? Sorry if some of it is awkward. To be honest, I wrote a lot of it in the wee hours of the morning. I hope you guys can bear with me until the end! It'll be nice to go on this journey with you! Heheh... I will fix the cover soon.**

**Please leave a review! Thanks :)**


	2. Chapter 2

Hiccup Haddock could hold his liquor. It was a talent he was proud of, and one that proved useful when booth girls dubbed him the responsible one for the evening. When both girls excused themselves to the restroom, he kept a careful eye on their drinks. When either got unwanted attention, he would place himself between the two to 'order a drink'.

The reluctantly proclaimed pet expert was deeply amused by Astrid's sudden femininity when she was drunk. He had harbored an honest crush on the girl, as did most of his classmates, but the romantic idea of her seemed to slip away as he listened to her bare her soul about a tv show he couldn't quite grasp.

An hour after it was officially the next day, Ray announced that it was late, and her brother had likely forgotten to eat their cats. The brunette hoped she meant feed.

" 'Ccup," Ray called ash she and Astrid forced one another down in attempt to stand up. "Getta cab and then ummm," she managed to stand and Hiccup helped her friend to her feet. "Getta home." Astrid nodded solemnly, as though Ray had shared some profound knowledge.

The boy walked behind them as the girl linked arms and loudly left the bar. Ray tripped nearly as soon as they left the building, and Hiccup rushed to help her up as Astrid doubled over, laughing.

It took almost twenty to guide the two into a cab, where they immediately fell asleep atop one another.

**XxX**

Getting Ruffnut into her house was the most complicated thing Hiccup had to do that night. She pushed him away as they stumbled across the lawn that led to her house and played dead at the foot of the tall steps leading to the door. Somehow he managed to get her to the doorstep, struggling to stand under her dead weight.

Taylor answered the door and took a minute, much to the near collapsed boy's annoyance, to laugh at the spectacle before grabbing his sister's arm and effortlessly slinging her over his shoulder, a feat that made Hiccup wince.

"Thanks, bro," Taylor snickered, tucking a five dollar bill into his friend's shirt pocket. Hiccup stood bewildered on the marble porch well after the door shut.

When he got back to the cab, Astrid had struck up a conversation with the driver about her boots, which she had removed and was showing the woman. Hiccup apologized shyly to the clearly amused cabbie as he helped his friend back into her footwear.

"Where to now?" The driver asked with a smile. It struck the boy that he had no idea where Astrid lived. Rather than risk the embarrassment of being ridiculed once more by Taylor, Hiccup came to a conclusion and told her his address.

The boy, when they arrived at his building, thanked and payed the driver, who was laughing as Astrid attempted to climb on his back, and complied to his friend's demands for a piggyback ride, as long as it would lessen the strife of getting her inside.

Toothless was at the door, mewling dejectedly as his owner sat Astrid on his bed.

Hiccup sat with his cat on his second-hand couch and sighed, grateful for the chance to rest as the blonde snored on away on his bed. "Today was weird, bud." he whispered to the cat as he laid down. Toothless mewed at his restless human as he curled up on the man's chest.

**XxX**

Hiccup was awoken by the squeaking of his bed springs as someone shot upright on them.

He sat up and turned to be greeted by his guest as she squealed, pulling blankets up to cover her fully clothed body, then grabbed a fistful of her hair and moaned.

The sudden noise and faded memory of the previous night and bringing someone home surprised the boy, who kept back and so, off the couch.

"What's happening, why am I here?" The blonde asked as her host emerged from the floor. "Tell me quietly."

"Uh," Hiccup tried to blink away his sleepy state and call the memory back to him. "I didn't know your address, so I brought you here instead? Sorry, was that wrong?" He asked sincerely, shooing away his cat as he led the groaning girl by the hand to his kitchen.

"Quieter." She scolded, her head down as she massaged her temple. Hiccup grinned, dropping a spoonful of coffee grounds into the machine and pouring in some water.

"Sorry," he whispered, leaning on the island as she took a seat on a bar stool across from him. "The most intimate thing that happened was that your highness demanded to ride on my back, so I think we're technically married in some countries, but it's cool." He grinned teasingly.

Astrid glanced up and squinted. "Ugh, you're too bright," she groaned, pushing him away.

Hiccup laughed and turned back to pour her a cup off coffee, then slid it to her.

Astrid popped a hangover pill into her mouth, wrinkled her nose and downed a mouthful of the drink, sticking out her tongue at the bitter taste. "So," she began, mostly to postpone drinking any more coffee. "Why do you live _here_?"

Hiccup shrugged, "I moved out of my dad's house when I was seventeen because I had a chance to open this place, but he was being really unsupportive. It was kinda stupid on my part. Honestly, we never got along."

"What, ever since your mom died?" Astrid scoffed, scratching at the handle of her mug.

"Yeah, actually." He grinned half-heartedly.

"Ugh," Astrid let her head fall onto the counter. "Why is your life a soap opera? I feel like I'm in a minefield."

"Sorry," He laughed.

"Should be." she returned, sitting back up and wincing as she took another drink. "Hate coffee." the blonde mumbled, running her fingers through her loose hair.

"So I noticed. Do you want sweetener? Ray made me buy some for the times when she breaks into my room to make coffee before lessons." Astrid laughed, feeling the need to apologize for her friend.

Toothless mewled at their feet, and Hiccup nudged him towards his food dish. "I think I might spoil him," he commented as the cat poked a button on a machine that dispensed food.

"I think it's cute," Astrid smirked, filling her coffee mug back up with creamer she had rooted around in his fridge for.

"Thanks," the boy ducked his head and opened the freezer. "Do you like waffles?"

"I don't wanna impose anymore than I have," she bit her lip.

"Nah, they're just frozen waffles, he shrugged, sliding a bottle of syrup onto the counter and tossing four waffles into the microwave.

The girl glanced around his kitchen for the first time. "This is pretty nice," she hummed.

"Yeah," the boy grinned, looking around with her. "This place used to be a church. They left most of their appliances."

"Cool," she replied, unable to think of anything else to say.

The two ate syrup-drowned waffles in silence, with the exception of Hiccup's constant and embarrassing recollections from the previous night. "Uh," the host groaned, glancing at the clock as he dropped paper plates into the trash. "We have classes soon. Want me to drive you? We should probably stop by your place to take care of Stormfly first."He held up a car key and grinned.

"Sure, I'll go get my purse." she smiled back. Within minutes hey were on the road, squabbling about music.

"My apartment is above Raven's Point. You know that little coffee shop?" Astrid told him, flipping the station.

"Stop it!" he almost growled, though his grin was lighthearted, he changed it back. "And yeah, that's actually where I found Toothless before bringing him home!"

"Awesome." she turned the channel back and stuck out her tongue. "And never."

When they arrived at her home Astrid fed and watered her indignant bird, who showed her displeasure by clicking nonstop until she got what she wanted. Before the classmates could leave again, she perched herself on Astrid's shoulder, rubbed her head on the girl's cheek, and flew off.

Hiccup smiled amusedly as Astrid conveyed her amazement and excitement to him as they walked down the halls. "She's never done anything like that before! I mean, she perches on me all the time, but only because she thinks I'm not paying enough attention to her. That was actually affectionate! Do you think she likes me?"

"Of course she likes you! You're-" he stopped short and hesitates, "Her owner."

Astrid elected to ignore his awkward pause and giggles. "I have no idea why I'm so happy about this," she flushes, holding open the door so her classmate can step outside.

"She's just usually so mean." Hiccup chuckled at that. "It's normal. Scott was overwhelmed when Fang was being affectionate for the first time, too. I was really excited when Toothless came to curl up with me for the first time. Pets are funny that way. It's nice, though." He grinned and held open his car door for her. "M'lady,"

**Sorry! I meant to upload this yesterday, but my mom turned off the internet before I could... I hope you enjoyed it, though! Does it seem rushed? I might have gone too fast :/ Sorry, I was super sleepy..**

**Please drop me a line c:**


	3. Chapter 3

Astrid had been off her game all day. Each time they past each other - which was more often than Astrid had realized - she blamed Hiccup for giving her coffee, a morning ritual she wasn't used to. He always ducked his head and grinned, apologizing in a sarcastic tone.

"You know, he totally used to have a crush on you," Ray teased from behind thick sunglasses that afternoon when Astrid told her about that morning's events, instead of studying, in the library.

Astrid rolled her eyes. "You don't know that. And even if he did, he doesn't anymore."

"Is that disappointment I hear?" she brought the glasses down the bridge of her nose and peered over the rim.

"No. I mean, he's sweet, but," she let her voice trail off, unsure of how she had planned on ending that sentence.

The smirking blonde across from her shoved her dark shades back up and leaned forward, twirling a finger idly in her hair and smacking nonexistent gum. "But he's tooootally cute, right?"

"So you date him," Astrid pushed her friend away and stared at her papers.

Speak of the devil, an out of breath Hiccup entered the library, scanning the room for a table. He lit up at the sight of his friends and threw his books down on the table, receiving a few glares. "I'm failing English." He informed them under his breath. The boy ran his fingers through his already mangled hair.

Astrid blinked twice, confused, and Ray nudged her in the side, giving her a Look that merited a swift kick.

"So you can retake it next semester? Big whoop." The twin shrugged, rubbing her shin.

"I uh, no, um..." he sighed and hid his face in his hands. "It's more complicated than that."

"God, Hiccup, you're such a drama queen." Astrid scoffed, shuffling through his books, marked English 101. "Without the attitude," she teased, "Tell us why you _so desperately _need to pass English."

"If I don't I'll lose the Dragon Academy." He groaned, ignoring her as he put his head on the table. "My dad said I have to get the credits I need to take over his job or he'll stop funding the Academy."

"Wow," Ray whistled. "You really need a tv crew to film your life."

Hiccup lifted his head long enough to toss her a glare. "It's barely surviving as it is. His money's all that's keeping me afloat. I figured I could make enough money to be able to make it on my own, but the entire English language sucks."

"I like it," Ray shrugged.

Astrid nodded. "Boys are just automatically bad at it."

Hiccup looked up to grin at her, then sat up properly and stared at the books in front of him. "I've been talking for seventeen years, why is it still so complicated?"

"It's not so bad," the bird owner next to him laughed. "There are just forty-two million rules that you won't actually put into practice in your day-to-day life unless you have a job as a writer or editor."

The boy scoffed and opened the book dramatically. "Do you think Fisher would tutor me?" he moans, giving up after a minute of staring at the nonsensical words that seemed to swim on the page the longer he squinted.

"What, a girl can't do it?" Ray made an offended noise.

"Uh, no offense, but I've seen you try to help the person next to you in class before, and Astrid, you're really stubborn. I can't imagine you'd have the patience for teaching me English." He wriggled his nose when she stuck out her tongue.

"Actually, Astrid's a really good teacher." The girl across from them interjected. "She helped me when I was failing math."

"Can't imagine that was easy," Hiccup teased, and chuckled at Ray's harrumph.

"It wasn't," Astrid replied, grinning when her friend poked her. "But she passed. Don't be so prejudice, Dragon Boy."

Taylor joined them quietly, no one noticing him but his sister. "Yo, guys, can you ease up on the sexual tension? I'm trying to breathe here."

Astrid looked indignant at the remark, and Hiccup stumbled over his words to come up with any clever counter argument. Ray quieted her brother with a thump on the head and he laughingly said he was sorry, though it was probably the most insincere apology Astrid had ever heard.

"Fish and Scotty are gonna come here in a little while," Taylor told the group, sniffling. "Figured we could train together."

"It's not training, dumbass, it's studying. Why aren't _you _failing English?" His sister scoffed at him.

"Because I rock." he reminded her loudly, earning a glare from the librarian.

A half hour passed accordingly until the aforementioned duo made their appearances. Scott regaled them with tales about their previous class.

"Chemistry rocks," he finished. "I can't believe there's a class about how to blow things up."

"It's supposed to be how _not _to blow things up." Fisher grunted, irritated.

"That's sooo not what I learned. Anyways, nerd, what's so fun about not blowing things up? Nothing."

"The chemical reactions are interesting!" The boy cried defensively.

"Riiight. So what are you ladies gabbing about?" Scott turned his attention to the rest of the group.

"Hiccup might lose the Academy funds if he doesn't figure out how the English language operates." Astrid grinned cheekily.

"Astrid's gonna tutor him." Ray winked, and Taylor cooed, wiggling his eyebrows suggestively.

Scott looked from Taylor to the two he was mocking. As Astrid and Hiccup exchanged embarrassed glances, he scowled. "That's a horrible idea." he claimed, startling his classmates. "You should just raise the money by yourself."

Hiccup shrugged, "That could work, too."

**Don'T worry. Although it might not seem like it, I do have a plan heheh. Two updates in one day will probably be rare.  
And no, Hiccup and Astrid aren't in love (yet), I just think Ruff and Tuff would go to town on them about every little thing (shippers, man.)  
Also, I really hope I didn't make Snotlout seem too mean. He only wants attention! :)**

**Review? I love you! ouo**


	4. Chapter 4

**Wow this is waaaay late. I'm sorry, I'd love to blame it on planning, or really anything productive, but in all honest, I got kinda depressed, and was in a weird state of self loathing. It would have been absolutely horrible of me to subject you to the kind of amateurish, depressive writing I do when I'm like that, I just completely gave up on writing for a while. I know, I suck (lol) I hope you'll forgive me long enough to read this chapter :)**

Hiccup couldn't help being slightly upset when it was announced that his friends would try to help him raise the money to support his business on their own. He felt like he was taking an easy way out of his deal with his dad. That, and he _was _a guy. The idea of spending hours alone with a pretty girl wasn't a horrible one.

"What about a bake sale?"

Ray suggested idly, making small circles on her paper with Fisher's pen, which he was frantically searching for.

"Does anyone know how to bake?"Scott scoffed.

Hiccup and Scott both nodded, unwavering even when Scott snickered at them.

"If they're the only ones, three's no point. What about a car wash?" Astrid countered.

Hiccup laughed out loud, only to be immediately hushed. "What a cliché," he teased quietly.

"It's a cliché because it works." She coughed defensively.

"It's popular because guys will always pay to see girls in bikinis." Scott smirked, and kicked him.

"We wouldn't wear swimsuits." She informed him pointedly.

"Your clothes would still probably get soaked." Hiccup bit the end of his pencil nervously.

"We could sell lemonade." Fisher's voice was small. Everyone was silent until he shrugged.

"If we were in grade school." Scott finally laughed.

Hiccup suddenly shook his head, pursing his lips and staring at the mountain of books piled between the girls. "You guys have to concentrate on your grades, right? It's okay if you don't help, I'll figure something else out."

"Are you kidding?" Ray groaned. "Thinking about just grades all the time is sooooo boring. Besides, if it hadn't been for the DA, Barf and Belch would still be, you know, wreaking havoc and living up to their names all over our house."

"I'm surprised you know the words 'wreaking' and 'havoc'," Astrid teased.

"Hey, I'm not the one failing English."

Hiccup wrinkled his nose at that, and the girls laughed at him.

"Why don't we hold a tutoring class?" Fisher tried again. "We can each teach the lessons we're best at it, and charge people."

"Wouldn't it just be easier to go with the original plan, them?" Ray rolled her eyes.

Hiccup groaned and let his head fall onto the desk again. "Real life isn't this hard on tv."

"That's because on tv everyone has problems perfectly tailored to work itself out." Astrid mused, grinning mischievously.

Scott drummed his fists on the table. "Nothing so far is going do get anywhere, huh?"

"We could try doing some odd jobs." Taylor shrugged. "In high school I charged five dollars to mow a lawn. We could each probably get a couple done in our pare time, and there's six of us, so..." he leaned back thoughtfully. "We could make five thousand in six weeks. I don't know if that would be enough or not."

Hiccup raised an eyebrow, pressing his lips together and calculated his expenses. "It would definitely work out." He nodded with an excited smile.

"Are we having training today?" Fisher asked the instructor, absent mindedly doodling on his paper with the pencil he finally wrestled away from Ray.

Hiccup nodded, closing his English book and glancing at the clock. "Be at my house after class?" he grinned and stood up. "See you then." He waved awkwardly, his arms full of books, and jokingly adjourned the meeting.

**XxX**

Classes at the Dragon Academy went well as usual. Hiccup caught himself watching Astrid as she listened to him teach the twins to keep their kittens from jumping on the counters. He was amused at how attentive she was, even when the rest were completely relaxed.

The class ended after Fisher's turtle managed to crawl through an obstacle course meant for cats. They spent an extra half hour planning their work course with a directory map of the town.

Once it had been decided who would be attempting to mow which lawn, the group dispersed.

When the only ones left were him, Astrid, and the twins, Hiccup hooked his thumbs in his pockets and pressed his lips together. "Do you need a ride?" he asked as Astrid gathered her things.

"No, Taylor's driving me home." She nodded toward the blond with a grin. Ray called her impatiently and the bird owner picked up Stormfly's cage and waved good-bye. "Thanks, though!" she called before running off.

Hiccup stretched and yawned once the door slammed closed behind Ray. He smiled down at the cat sitting patiently at his feet. "Hungry, Bud?"

Toothless mewled expectantly and stood up to lead him to the apartment door.

The boy and his cat ate their dinner in silence before the phone rang, startling both. Hiccup nearly fell out of his chair, completely unused to getting calls on the landline.

He answered it, expecting a salesman, and was further shocked to hear a familiar female voice.

"Hello?" It came a second time when he didn't answer.

"Uh, yeah, hi? Haddock residence, may I ask who's calling?" he responded awkwardly. There was a snort of laughter from the other end, followed by poorly concealed giggles. "I'm hanging up." He threatened.

"Don't do that, Mr. Haddock," the girl teased, forcing her laughter to stop.

"I'm serious," He wasn't. Her chuckles were beginning to get on her nerves, though.

"Okay, Hiccup, wait." she coughed, a smile still evident in her voice, even when she stopped laughing. "It's Hofferson," she continued to mock him. "I think I left my cell at your place last night."

"Oooh, that sounds scandalous." The boy grinned when she giggled again, thankful it was _with _him instead of _at _him._  
_

"I don't usually use it, so I only just noticed." Astrid explained, and Hiccup was thankful that the old church's landline was cordless as he wandered into the living room/his bedroom and lazily scanned the area.

"Know where you might've left it?"

"Uhh, the kitchen counter? No, not really, sorry." She laughed sheepishly.

The cat owner held the phone between his cheek and shoulder to dig his cell phone out of his pocket. "Tell me your number, I'll call it."

"Ahh, I see, this is a ploy to get my number, huh?"

"Of course. I've been planning this for months."

He succeeded in making her chuckle again before she spouted her number. He pressed the call button for the lost phone and listened attentively. "I hear it," he whispered to the girl on the phone when a sound like a muffled bell went off.

"Congratulations." she whispered back. Hiccup flipped over his pillow, and beneath it was a metallic blue flip phone.

"Found it." He announced, holding up the phone. "This is surprising girly." he grinned at a swirling flower design on the front.

"Can it, Haddock." Astrid scoffed.

"I'll get it to you in class tomorrow."

"Awesome, thanks."

The line went silent for a moment.

" 'Night."

"Goodnight."

**Wowee I'm superbly sorry. **

**I love you? It's probably annoying to have such oddly spaced updates, huh? **

**Reviews give me the energy to press on! :D**


	5. Chapter 5

**Auch sorry this is so late! I had written myself into a corner and that gave me block, then i had like fifty million other story ideas (Which i promise I'll leave on hold until I finish this one... it'll be hard, though...)**

Astrid and Stormfly were getting along better than before, likely thanks to Hiccup's teaching. The bird often perched on her shoulder as she went about her daily routine. The blonde did as their instructor had told her and distracted the bird with breakfast so she could sneak out the door.

Once downstairs, she waited for a pretty pale blue car to pick her up. Instead, an old red pick up rolled into its place.

Scott leaned on the passenger seat and grinned smugly. "Hey, pretty lady, you free?" Astrid rolled her eyes, smiling as she stepped up to the window. "Taylor has the sniffles, so I'm getting you guys." He motioned to the back seats, where Fisher and Ray barely waved before returning to talk to whatever topic they were engrossed in.

"Nerds," Scott mouthed as Astrid jumped into the passenger seat and buckled her seat belt. Scott started the truck, and the noise of the engine was quickly followed by Fisher making a whirring sound (Vworp, Vworp) that startled the blonde in the front seat.

She turned, surprised, to look at the laughing duo falling on top of one another. Fisher adjusted an imaginary bow tie, and Astrid decided it was some odd inside joke.

Scott coughed a bit to call the attention of the girl next to him as she settled back into her seat. He flashed a quick teasing grin at her fright. "You must be glad we're gonna do the fundraising thing, huh?" she gave him a curious look and he continued. "Don't have to babysit the nerd."

She assumed he was referring to her tutoring Hiccup. "No, I was looking forward to what, honestly. He seemed to have," She paused, then shrugged, "Sincere intentions, and it might have been fun!" She smiled.

Scott snorted, but remained silent. So was the rest of the car ride, except for the radio, which blasted, to Astrid's surprise, Carrie Underwood. Not that she was going to judge.

They arrived at the college campus and headed for their respective classes.

"I thought you and Scott lived in the dorms?" Astrid suddenly remembered, calling Fisher's attention away from Ray's parting figure.

"Um, yeah, but... Ray called and asked me to pick her up, and Scott offered to drive since, you know, he has a car." the blond grinned.

Astrid hummed softly at that. The hefty boy continued to smile until something else caught his eye and he suddenly waved and shouted, "Hiccup!"

A boy sporting a Game of Thrones themed backpack whirled around and grinned brightly, rushing back to meet them in the middle.

"Nice _backpack,_" Astrid snickered. "But the middle school is across town."

Green eyes rolled. "Thanks, that's nice to hear from the girl wearing a Hello Kitty headband. It happens to be _practical."_

"Practically lame." she retorted. "Hello Kitty is ironically fashionable these days, excuse you."

"Guys, as much as I'd love to stick around and watch you flirt, we have a class."

Hiccup lit up red, the coloring hiding some of his freckles (shame...) and followed Fisher to the building. Astrid ran after them quickly.

They weren't _flirting..._

**XxX**

The five of them met up in the cafeteria at lunch, not for any particular reason. Hiccup told about the cat things Toothless got up to; things you're likely to find if you search 'cats' on youtube.

Ray said that Barf and Belch hunted a rabbit and brought the dead animal to Taylor, which, being allergic to rabbits, they assumed was what made him sick.

Scott was proud that Hookfang chased off some nuisance cat who always managed to find its way into the dorm halls (behavior Hiccup said wasn't to be praised) and Fisher informed his friends that Meatlaug figured out how to get into the cabinet to her food.

Astrid excitedly revealed that her and Stormfly were getting along well, and that sometimes when she was humming around the house, the bird would join in the song.

After they finished both their stories and food, they waved each other off and headed three separate ways.

Astrid was a bit relieved her next class was with Hiccup, if it couldn't be with Ray. He was her favorite company, aside from her best friend.

The two joked the lecture away, comparing notes in the library after class to make sure the other didn't miss anything.

Hiccup jokingly copied her doodle of the professor, too, only his drawing must have been five times better.

Thus they began discussing art.

By the time she had to leave for her next class they had filled two pages of Astrid's notebook with a million doodles.

Ray took notice of the page and, upon hearing the explanation, cooed. "Why Astrid! Have you been flirting?"

The blonde rolled her eyes and shook her head.

They _weren't _flirting!

**XxX**

Ray and Fisher made a sort of bet on who could get more lawns done in one day. The person who lost had to contribute ten dollars towards the Academy.

Scott and Astrid were assigned to work on the street above theirs, one on each side of the road.

Hiccup worked a block above them, and when Taylor got better, he would work on the street opposite Hiccup. With this system they set out to work.

Some houses had riding mowers, some had push mowers, and others seemed to have not yet stumbled upon the wonders of electricity yet and handed them hand clippers and the kind of push mower that seemed to run on will power alone.

Fortunately for most of the kids, only Scott seemed to find the last kind of house, and only got the one done before Hiccup drove around the blocks, picking each one up in turn.

"I am so bushed!" Ray groaned, falling against Astrid in the back seat. "This totally calls for an after party!"

"Eew, Ray you's all sweaty!" The other girl laughed, pushing her friend away. "Besides, for there to be an 'after party', there needs to be a, uh, before party."

Ray ignored her out of spite. "You guys should come to my house and get cleaned up, then we can go drink away our youth. Fisher keeps clothes at our house, since he used to practically live there, and you guys can borrow Tay's junk." She motioned to the boys in the front seats."

Everyone agreed that it was the best idea they had heard all day, but decided against bars and for the diner in town. After an hour they were fresh and ready to go. Ray had insisted on dressing Astrid, so her clothed were much more showy than she was used to, but admittedly more fashionable.

The boys had damp hair (okay, well, excluding Scott) and all three wore nerdy t-shirts.

"I think I gave this one to Taylor!" Hiccup motioned to the design, a chair made up of swords. Astrid didn't understand what the picture was referencing and was surprised to learn that he and the twins were childhood friends.

"He was sooo pissed you got taller than him. 'Specially cause you used to be so itty bitty." Ray snorted.

"I'm taller than you, too, you know."

Scott had on a shirt that said 'Totally' and underneath the radical sign - ah, math humor - Fisher's shirt just had a big blue telephone box on it.

"Seriously," Ray rolled her eyes when Astrid expressed her confusion toward the sword throne and blue box marked 'police'. "You's so not nerdy that's it's uncool."

**XxX**

The night was relaxing, and if the college students gathered comfortably around the table in the diner hadn't just worked their asses off, it would be boring. Everyone went home sleepy and safely.

**Yup okay maybe that was an awkward ending?  
You have no idea how awkward it is to refer to college students as kids! I'm only 16 it makes me feel old!  
Please express your face in the box down there**

**l  
v**


	6. Chapter 6

Hiccup was awake later than he would have preferred. The only thing keeping him from falling asleep with the phone pressed against his cheek was a little black cat that head butted him when he started nodding off.

"I told you, Taylor, nothing happened. We all just got dinner and went hoe. It was nothing exciting, but if you really want to we can go again tomorrow." He glanced up at the clock and moaned. "Later today."

The person at the other end sniffled. "Seriously? You promise?"

"Sure," he tried not to yawn.

"You can't back out later! Bye!"

Hiccup kept the phone pressed to his ear for a good five minutes before he realized the line had gone dead. He glanced at Toothless, who mewled. "Okay, Bud, let's go to bed." He finally let a yawn fee and took the cat under his arm.

Toothless meowed in protest and wiggled to get away, but his human ignored him.

**XxX**

The next day was a lot like the one before it, excluding the absence of the sixth member.

Hiccup met the twins and Astrid when they parked, having had spotted Taylor's car when he pulled up.

He and Astrid walked to the first lecture together, where they sat drawing a goofy comic about ducks until they had to go their separate ways.

They met again at lunch and waited a while for their friends, but ended up eating without them.

"I don't know how she expects us to be able to pay attention when she drones on like that. She just states facts! I mean…"

Hiccup was grinning. "Yeah, I don't get why professors would _do _that. Stating facts? Your job is to contradict the truth! How dare you!"

"You know what I mean! She talks like she's reading straight out of a twelfth grade textbook."

"I know what you mean." He smiled teasingly.

She whacked him in the arm. "Jerk."

"How's your bird?"

"She's been doing great! Yesterday she found a mouse and annoyed it until it ran away."

"You have mice?"

"Can't really afford the rent without a roommate or two." The made him laugh, which she discovered she liked. "What about you?"

"Me? Nah, mice probably figure they can do better." She giggled and realized she had been twirling her hair around her index finger. Quickly, she puts her hand down, surprising her lunch mate.

"Uh, no, I mean how's Toothless?"

Hiccup shrugged, "He's about as spoiled as Last night he seriously didn't want me to fall asleep." He rubbed his chin. "I'm going to have a bruise."

"Aw, poor Hiccup. Beat up by a kitty."

"A vicious, evil kitty." His tone was still fond, completely contradicting his words.

"The sweetest ball of fluff on four legs."

Hiccup shook his head. "I am almost certain that he was a dragon in his past life?"

"You believe in that kind of thing?" Astrid wasn't being judgmental, only curious. Hiccup narrowed his eyes playfully.

"Is whether or not I believe the point?" He scoffed as if he had been cornered, but he was grinning.

Astrid rolled her eyes and smiled. "I have to go to class, dork."

"Me too, butted."

"What a retort." She snickered as he snatched away her tray.

They ended up sitting far away from each other in their next class together, so the next time they met that day was at the arranged gathering point.

Fisher was the last to show, but he finally famed running they piled into Taylor and Hiccup's cars and headed out.

The gardening went better than it had yesterday, though someone misunderstood and had Fisher watch their five-year old until their aunt came. Someone else asked Hiccup to take off his shirt while he worked and, after Taylor gave him a huge grin and two thumb up, he awkwardly complied.

The drivers soon went to gather the rest of their group - Taylor grabbing his sister and Fisher and Hiccup went to Astrid and Scott's section. When all three of the latter group had climbed into the little red car, Hiccup's phone rang.

"It's Taylor," he mouthed to the girl in the passenger seat.

"Hiccup you gotta come to Fisher and Rayya's street. House, um, 211," Was all that was said before the line went dead.

The boy shrugged obeyed the order. They came to the house to see Taylor in the driveway, waving his arms frantically.

All four headed inside to see Fisher sitting cross-legged on the floor with a small child in his lap.

"I have to stay here until her aunt comes." He seemed like he was still confused about the situation. "There's money on the counter for pizza."

Hiccup pressed his lips together and shrugged. "We can babysit."

"What?" Taylor whined. "I wanted to go party! You promised! I don't wanna watch some kid all- oh my God are those coloring books?"

The kid's aunt was probably surprised to see six college students sprawled across the living room, scribbling to their heart's content, the floor covered in open coloring books and crayon boxes and a couple of pizza boxes.

**XxX**

The next day was a lot like the one before it… again. Minus, somewhat to their dismay, any babysitting gigs. The few weeks following it were the same as well, and passed quickly with a strict schedule. The twins treated everyone to dinner every night until they reached the date of their deadline.

Hiccup withdrew all the money from the account they had set up and returned to his friends looking like he was going to cry.

"Are you that happy?" Scott asked nervously after a long silence. Hiccup shook his head and handed him a paper. His jaw dropped. "It says here there were only twenty dollars." Hiccup nodded and held up a twenty-dollar bill."

"How is that possible?" Astrid exhaled irritatedly.

"I don't know." His expression was slowly becoming angry. "I kept saying there was a mistake, but she just shook her head…"

"Who cares?" Taylor scoffed. "We'll just use some of our money tonight! Ray and I can pay. We're not poor, you know."

Everyone looked at the twins.

Taylor blinked. "What? That's the money we were using to pay for dinner, right?"

Slowly, any trace of confusion in Hiccup's expression burned away. "You _what_?" He grit his teeth.

"What's wrong? That's what it was for, right?"

"No! That money was going to help me keep my academy! And now, thanks to you, I'm going to lose it, and take over my dad's dumb job!" Small pauses awkwardly punctuated his yelling when he remembered there were children present. He was about to continue, but couldn't think of anything to say without swearing, so he opted for storming out.

Astrid closed her eyes and sighed, then turned to the twins.

"Seriously, guys?"

**Okay so this chapter might be a little lame... It was written at like three in the morning ****pff...**

**Thanks for reading! Ilu wow**


	7. Chapter 7

Astrid took a bus to Hiccup's place. She would have gotten a ride from one of her friends, but they all rejected the idea swiftly, unwilling to be one of the few to experience an angry Hiccup.

She had rolled her eyes at the wimpy ways they backed out; what babies. Hiccup was harmless! Probably.

Clutching a plastic grocery bag, the blonde bravely headed into the cold ex-sanctuary.

"Hiccup?" She called, and the name bounced off the walls and came back to her.

The fact that both the front door, and the one leading to the gym were unlocked didn't surprise her anymore because Hiccup had admitted, with his head bowed so no one could see the blush heating his cheeks - and even so, his embarrassment was evident in his voice - that he felt that even if it was old and a little rundown, a church should never be sealed off to the public. The door to his apartment, though, was locked tightly.

She wound her way through the halls and to his door, beating on it irritatedly. Toothless accompanied her noises by meowing loudly after each knock. Astrid almost giggled - was Toothless a dog or a cat?

Finally, with an annoyed groan, Hiccup swung open his door and glared. "What?"

"Don't pull the whole 'I wanna be alone waaahhwah' spiel." She pushed past him and plopped the bag onto the table. "You have my sympathy, but you won't improve your grade by moping around." She grabbed several bags of snacks out of her grocery bag before revealing her secret weapon.

"Beer numbs the pain."

**XxX**

Hiccup inhaled shakily.

He felt oddly drunk, likely due to the crushed cans of beer piled on the coffee table between him and his tutor. He wasn't _used _to feeling drunk. It was a weird feeling.

The boy was suddenly hyper aware of the pretty blonde next to him. Her eyelashes were longer thane had realized, and he opted to stare at his paper rather than the smiling blue eyes beneath the light lashes.

Astrid leaned closer to her student and his breath caught in his throat at the sudden movement. He, against his better judgment, nervously let his eyes travel back to her before he noticed her lips were forming words.

What kind of creep got that caught up in his own delusions?

"Hiccup,are you even listening to me?" The girl scolded.

"Yeah, I'm sorry, you were saying?" He _knew _he should have kept his eyes on his paper. Now he had an overwhelming urge to touch her. The was weird, right? People don't just touch someone.

He urged himself to make sense of her words as he struggled not to stare at her lips.

Oh, that's what it was. He wanted to kiss her.

"What?"

"Huh?" Hiccup's eyebrows shot up. He hadn't said that out loud. He knew he hadn't. He could have possibly... Astrid's cheeks were flushed, however, in a way that told him he most certainly had.

"I-I'm sorry, I didn't mean... um..." he began, but he couldn't think of a word to say. He had, actually, meant it, but she wasn't supposed to know that.

To his complete surprise, the girl moved closer. "Seriously?" She smiled, and Hiccup wondered if part of her blush was due to the alcohol. She licked her lips. "Let's do that." Yup, she was definitely drunk, too.

"I haven't ever done that before," he admitted in a whisper. "Care to demonstrate?" Yes, that felt like it sounded suave.

She made a contented humming noise and closed her eyes before pressing her lips to his.

When they parted, he blinked rapidly. "I don't think I totally got that, can you do it again?"

"Take notes this time," she replied somewhat sternly and grabbed his hoodie, pulling him towards her again.

"**Hiccup**!"

He opened his eyes slightly and stared up at a clearly amused blonde. But when had she gotten up there?

"I thought you couldn't get drunk," Astrid grinned. "You were fine one second, the next you were completely off your rocker, and than you totally blacked out. Did you have a nice dream? Your grin was so big it could barely fit in the room. Hiccup?"

The trainer had turned his head into the table. Great. Just great.

**XxX**

Studying ended more quickly than either had imagined it would, and Hiccup stopped complaining about the headache he would have in the morning after Astrid stabbed him in the arm with her pencil every time he did. She felt she got the gist of being an animal trainer.

"Are you even certified to do it?" She asked him through a mouthful of chocolate when they decided to call it quits for the night. "Being an animal trainer, I mean."

"Umm, technically I'm only allowed to be doing it with a proper animal caretaker's supervision, but I got pulled out of getting my, um, degree thing by my dad, so..." he grinned innocently.

"Is he legally allowed to force you into a certain career option?"

"_You're _the lawyer, you tell me. I don't think that even it wasn't legal, I couldn't talk. Anyways, he's taking care of my tuition."

Astrid squinted at him and shrugged. "Whatever, just don't get caught."

"Totally living on the edge here." he grinned.

She stood and dusted off her skirt. Placing her hands on her hips, she glanced around the room. "So, I'll be borrowing your couch."

Hiccup glanced up at her and furrowed his brow. "For what?"

"Obviously because I don't know where the bathroom is," she said, then laugh at his troubled expression. "I'm going to sleep on it, numbskull."

"Why?"

"Because," Astrid condescended, "It's dark out, and the last bus is already gone."

"Right, that's dangerous." he suddenly understood, then stood with her, his eyebrows still knit together. "But you can't sleep on the couch."

"Can't I?" She challenged, slightly offended.

"Of course not! I can't let my guest sleep on the couch!" Well, he hadn't said 'a girl'.

"I'd be a bad guest if I took the host's bed!"

"I'm not folding, Astrid."

"Neither am I!" She crossed her arms, and teasingly smirked. "We're going to end up sleeping on it together."

Hiccup's cheeks flared, his dream flashing in his mind.

"I'm only kidding, calm down. You look like a sixteen-year-old, man."

He covered the red with both palms and wrinkled his nose at her. "I'm going to sleep."

After a few minutes, Astrid kissed his cheek. "I'm stealing your bed again!" She announced before skipping away.

Hiccup sunk onto the couch, staring at the ceiling. His cat hopped onto his chest and lay down, giving him an obviously judgmental look.

The trainer pressed on Toothless' paw pads with his thumbs. "What are _you _looking at?"

**in other news hiccup is a criminal.**

**Not really, because he's legally certified, but he didn't complete the course completely. He was almost done when his dad said he needed to spend more time focusing on 'important things', so the teacher just graduated him. Oops.**

**This chapter might be a little awkward cause i wrote most of it when i was half asleep I'm sorry...**


	8. Chapter 8

Hiccup once again woke up with a pretty blonde in his bed. The same pretty blonde as before. Astrid, who he was afraid he was beginning to develop legitimate feelings for.

This time when he awoke, however, she was neither sleeping or hung over. Well, maybe she had a little headache, but it couldn't compare to the boy's throbbing head and rising nauseous feeling.

Astrid smirked as the brunette groaned in pain. "Wimp," She teased and he glared at her.

"Right. You say that now, but a week ago you were the one whining and moping around."

"I was _not _whining."

Hiccup nodded that she was and immediately regretted it. "And yelling. Obviously the smartest move when your brain is so friend it's numb." He said, mostly in wonderment. He'd never really been hung over before. There weren't really any (child friendly) words in his vocabulary to describe the feeling. Which was a reason he needed tutoring.

"I can start yelling again, if you want." It was mostly an empty threat, but Hiccup recoiled anyways, his eyes showing honest fear at the idea.

Astrid tossed him a malicious grin before pushing herself off the bed and heading to the kitchen to make coffee. She barely remembered where the ingredients were since last time.

Hiccup stumbled into the room and groaned gratefully at the sight and smell of the breakfast his friend had tossed into the microwave.

"Healthy selection." She commented, closing the freezer and shivering. He smiled sarcastically, unable to retort through a mouthful of coffee.

"So," Astrid poured sweetener into her own flowery mug before taking it in both hands. "There's a really good book we can use to help with your studies." She grinned and sipped her coffee when he made a face.

"Studies..." he repeated with his nose wrinkled. "Studying is for nerds."

"An eloquent argument, to be sure." Astrid would have looked genuinely surprised if it hadn't been for the mischievous glint in her eye. "Though by that logic I don't see why you should have a problem."

Hiccup groaned. "That was really lame. Okay, Mi'lady, what book?"

She grabbed her laptop - she _had _packed study material with her snacks and alcohol - off the coffee table and sat on the bar stool next to him, quickly typing the name into the local library's website search engine. "I know it's not at the school library."

"Saying that makes you sound like you're fourteen." The comment earned the brunette a slap on the arm.

"Library on campus. Happy? Oh..."

"What?"

**XxX**

The library that the boy and his tutor needed was a town away, and both felt more inclined to take the subway as Hiccup's car was in the shop after an unfortunate incident involving a stray cat who didn't seem to approve of the quiet hum his A/C made.

The subway wasn't due for another ten minutes, so the two were talking about their pets when Astrid stumbled backwards, turning curiously to find her purse yanked off her shoulder.

With the quick reflexes that come with being a cat owner, Hiccup grabbed the perpetrator's arm. " 'Scuse me, that's my friend's, sir."

The man pulled away, confident he was stronger than the boy, but being an animal trainer is not an occupation for the weak. The brunette tightened his grip. "I took karate for a year, you know." he said in a slightly more dangerous voice.

The thief narrowed his eyes and, after a moment's thought, pulled back to aim a blow at Hiccup.

The trainer dodged shakily, but wasn't so lucky the second time.

The sound of impact - and probably a girly screech - was drowned out by a shrill whistle. The thief dropped the purse and looked up to see a security guard running towards him. The bag landed with a jingle next to Hiccup's head.

Astrid stood over the groaning boy, smirking. "Obviously you took karate."

"I never said I was any good." He grinned back.

"My hero."

**XxX**

The pair found a ton of books on not only English, but three other subjects Hiccup was struggling in. Astrid snuck in a child's E-Z Study book, mostly to spite her friend, but also because study methods meant for kids were usually more helpful and less complicated than ones for adults.

They grabbed lunch at a nearby diner, pouring over their new finds and sipping milkshakes.

"Really, Astrid?" Hiccup glared at her, holding up a book. The cover depicted excited children doing what he could only assume was the hokey-pokey on a sentence diagram. "This doesn't even make sense!"

She shrugged, grinning as he tried to comprehend the picture.

"Gee, Astrid, what's a - and correct me if I'm mispronouncing this - noun?" He held the book open and was feigning confusion at the colorful animal that informed him that a noun was, in fact, a person, place, or thing. (Someone had scrawled "oR idEa" in orange crayon beside the bubble.)

"How have you managed to be sooo witty with such a limited vocabulary?"

"It's been a struggle." He flashed her a false weary smile.

"I can imagine." She scoffed and thanked the waiter as he cleared the table.

"You're welcome, you guys have a nice date." Both the line and hint of desperation in the man's voice made the boy at the table cover his mouth to keep from chuckling.

"We're not on a date." Astrid informed him, keeping her eyes on the paper she was checking over.

"Oh, really?" The waiter leaned one hand on the table, hiding the animal trainer from sight should she choose to look up.

The boy coughed to disguise a fit of laughter when the blonde's only response was, "M-hm." The waiter frowned and placed the last plate on his tray.

Hiccup looked up and watched him disappear into the kitchen.

"I think, I _think, _he was trying to hit on you." he snickered. "And you won't give the poor guy a second glance."

"Terrible aren't I?"

"The absolute worst. You obviously owe it to him to flirt back, seeing as he was kind enough to do his job and bring us food."

"I wasn't aware of that. Next time I'll try to be more courteous." She glanced up and grinned. "Unfortunately for him, I'm already interested in someone."

"Oh really?" Never mind that his heart sank into his stomach. "Who?"

Astrid's smile turned mischievous and she handed him the paper she was looking over. "You missed the ones I circled. Try again."

"Astriiiiid!"

**I don't know ok (hides)  
****Also there are just one or two chapters left wow this is a weird feeling.**

**Please review and I'll give you a hug ok is that cool or if you don't like touching people i can just nod appreciatively in your direction**


	9. Chapter 9

Astrid had Hiccup on a strict schedule that often involved nightly sleepovers. There were only three times in two whole weeks that one did not stay the night at the other's residence.

By the end of those weeks, Hiccup was sure that he now didn't know anything but the English language. He felt like all other knowledge had been rudely shoved out his ear.

"Don't be such a baby," Astrid rolled her eyes when he voiced his complaints.

Even for all his whining, Hiccup was proud as could be when he aced the practice test Astrid had given him.

"You did it!" She cried out, circling the 98 she had scrawled at the top with vigor before throwing her fists in the air. Then she brought down both hands to cover her mouth. "Finally," she tried to sound exasperated, but couldn't quite pull it off with the giant smile that took over her lips.

In a final act of excitement, the blonde threw her arms around her student. He hugged her back quickly before she pulled away, keeping a hand on each of his shoulders. "So now that's done! I can get through at least this semester without a hitch! I can probably keep my academy forever unless my dad goes back on his word, which doesn't really sound like him, I mean, he's an okay guy, but y-"

Astrid isn't one hundred percent sure what exactly possessed her to do it. Maybe it was because she was still completely enthralled - the lack of sleep she had gotten last night taking its toll on her emotions and keeping her on that high. Maybe she just wanted him to shut up for once because she _knew _from personal experience that _nothing _could stop him once he started ranting. All she was really certain of is that she would be perfectly content with doing it again... and again, and again, and again.

And so, grabbing his well-worn brown hoodie, she yanked him forward and pushed her lips against his. The sudden action obviously caught him by surprise, judging by the high-pitched squeak he made, and Astrid noted that kissing someone while they're talking isn't the brightest idea, because her lip collided a bit with his teeth.

All in all, it wasn't particularly the most romantic smooch of the century, in fact it was mostly awkward.

Astrid quickly moved away, releasing his jacket, which she now realized she had been clutching. Hiccup just stared at her with wide, green eyes, his mouth falling open slightly as words stuck in his throat in an attempt to all race out at once. Instead of them, his tongue darted out and he licked his lips nervously.

"I... got...ta go..." she stood up, grabbed her bag, and fled the scene, fitting in a quick, louder than necessary, "Bye," before slamming the door behind her.

Luckily it was still early in the evening, so Astrid was able to catch the bus, fumbling her phone as she sank into her seat.

Ray could barely greet her caller before Astrid said, "My house, now. Bring ice cream." After a thoughtful pause she added, "And beer."

Ray was laughing when she hung up the phone, but the promise of something to drown her embarrassment in was much higher on Astrid's list of things that mattered.

Her friend was already lounging on her couch when she got home, a pack of beer on the table with two tubs of ice cream with plastic spoons stuck in the middle like flag poles.

This time, Ray was the one to interrupt her friend's greeting. "Sit, talk." she held out Barf the kitten. "And cuddle."

Sensing her owner's grief, Stormfly was already perched on Astrid's shoulder as she sat down and was handed a tub of Rocky Road. On a scale of one to oh, God, how cheesy was it that Astrid's first thought was that the ice cream she cradled was a reflection of her last hour or so?

"Well? Spill!" Astrid stared at her friend for a moment before obeying with a whine.

"I kissed him."

"_What?_" Ray squealed in delight. "Why, oh _why _do you look so downcast, then? In case you haven't noticed – and never, ever tell him I said this – Hiccup is hot."  
"Because," she paused, considering her friend's point. "It wasn't completely... mutual?"

When pressed for details, she continued only after gulping down the rest of her beer and inhaling deeply.  
I have no idea why. It was weird and seriously awkward and when I pulled away he was making this face." She gave her very best, if slightly drunken, impression of Hiccup's reaction and Ray was floored.

She didn't stop giggle-snorting until Astrid shoved a spoon in her mouth.

"Amnd?" Ray asked around her ice cream. "What wash it like?"

Astrid's spoon snapped.

"Awkward, like I said. But, uh..." She paused as she went to get a new spoon. "If it was under different circumstances and his tooth didn't smash into my lip, I wouldn't _totally _mind doing it again?" She plopped back onto the couch and glared as Ray suggestively waggled her eyebrows.

"So, like, did he say anything? Did shenanigans ensue?"

"Not... exactly? I, uh, kinda hightailed it out of there."

"Astrid!" After her exclamation, Ray proceeded to give Astrid an hour-long lecture on exactly why not to run out after practically headbutting someone with your mouth. Astrid sat as though she was a child being scolded.

"It doesn't even matter now, though, cause you're gonna see him again, like, tomorrow."

"Aaaaaaaaugh," Astrid returned, eloquent as a caveman.

**XxX**

Ray stayed the night and was waiting with Astrid for their ride when a familiar, recently-out-of-the-autoshop grey car pulled up in Taylor's usual spot containing one Hiccup Haddock. It was only then that Ray spoke.

"Whoa, look at that," she gasped as she yanked the passenger door open and shoved Astrid inside. "I guess I accidentally called two people to pick us up. I am such an airhead."

"Can't argue that!" came a call from behind them, and Astrid glanced in the rearview mirror to see a grinning Taylor in the car behind them. Ray pushed down the car lock and slammed Astrid's door.

"Hiccup Haddock the Third if you don't floor it, so help me..."

Astrid didn't hear her friend's threat as they pulled out and sped away. Hiccup looked so scared of Ray that Astrid would have laughed, had she not run out after kissing him just twelve hours ago.

Hiccup tapped his fingers on the steering wheel. "So, uh... last night happened,"

"It did." She pressed her lips together in a way that mimicked his own nervous tic.

"And you left before I could really react. Beyond, you know..." He made a face that was an exaggerated version of the one from the previous night. He smiled slightly. "Sure, it would have taken a while for me to say anything intelligible aside from 'what', but-"

"It's okay, Hiccup, I get that it was weird. I mean, you don't have to say anything. Spare me the 'I don't see you like that' speech."

"Um, but... What if that's not what I was going to say?" At her wordless surprise, he continued. "I mean, er, I kinda... _do _see you like that." He grinned at her. "I like, like-like you."

"God..." Astrid buried her face in her book-bag for a moment before smiling at him. "You are so lame!"

Hiccup sat in stunned silence, the red light in front of them enabling him to turn and cock his head at her. Then he laughed. "Astrid Hofferson, do you _ever _think before you move your lips."

"Nope." She answered without hesitation. "Light's green, nerd."

Hiccup grinned and coughed. "So, uh, what do you... You, uh..." He turned red. "Do you, um..."

"Do you ever _not _think before you move your lips?" she mocked.

"Do you wanna go out with me?" The trainer blurted before quietly adding, "Or something..."

After a highly unnecessary moment's thought, just to make him squirm (which he did. Literally.) Astrid nodded and grinned. "Sure, I could swing that. I, like, like-like you, too."

"Dork." Hiccup mumbled affectionately under his breath.

**Yup okay so that chapter was a lot more ****romance-oriented than I had planned, but that's okay, we'll manage.**

**I hope you enjoyed the efforts I put into this chapter to make is as cheesy and give you as much second-hand embarrassment as I possible could, given my current personal circumstances.**

**Please leave a review and I'll get the next chapter up as soon as I can!**


	10. Chapter 10

Hiccup was not cheering inwardly. Don't let anyone tell you differently.

He wasn't.

Really.

That would be cheesy and ridiculous and lame, and he wasn't any of those things. Not _really. _Ahem. Anyways, he wasn't so excited he had to tap on the steering wheel because the only alternative to getting the stirring need to move out would be to yell. Loudly.

Even if he was, he was too happy to really worry about anything but the ache in his cheeks from smiling.

Like I said, not cheesy.

He really did have other things to worry about, though, and Astrid brought down his cloud by reminding him in a swift move to assumably crush his spirit. He made the thought known with a glare that ended up looking more like a toddler's pouting.

"If I was trying to crush your spirit, I wouldn't agree to go out with you." She scoffed, blunt as ever. Hiccup still frowned.

"I'm, like, 80% sure I can get above average." He informed her haughtily, pursing his lips.

"Sure, if you stop, like, using the word like wrong, like, seriously, man." She snickered when he rolled his eyes dramatically.

They bickered lightheartedly until they reached campus and Hiccup shied when the twins were already there with matching wicked grins.

Taylor punched him in the arm, claiming, "I totally knew it, man."

"I assume we don't have to tell you who's going to beat you up if you make her cry," Ray leaned against Astrid. "It's her, she will beat you up."

"Same goes for you, young lady." Taylor nodded, feigning complete seriousness. "Hiccup isn't really big enough to fend for himself-"

"Hey!"

"But we will be forced to take drastic measures if you upset him. He's delicate, you know." the blond whispered loudly as if Hiccup couldn't hear him. The trainer sulked.

"I'll be careful," Astrid assured him with a poorly hidden grin. She held her boyfriend(?)'s arm and tugged him along to their first class. "Come on, now, they're going to keep teasing until we leave."

"Don't think it'll stop then!" The twins chorused before heading to their own lectures.

Hiccup managed to not stare at and/or think about Astrid his first three classes, with varying degrees of success.

When Ray and Astrid met him in the library before his English class he was completely jittery, and had been for the past half hour.

"Chill," Ray commanded simply, as if his problems could all be solved if she said so.

"Thanks, I'm miraculously completely better now." He snapped.

"You're welcome." She returned, smirking at his apologetic look.

"You still have twenty minute's free time, right?" Astrid pointed out. "Just, um, try to calm your nerves." she pushed her tea towards him. "Talk about something to get your mind off it."

Hiccup stared at her offering of a drink before sipping it. "Yeah, but... what?"

"What does your dad do that he's so determined you inherent, or whatever?" Ray offered, and Hiccup blanched. Astrid gave her a look.

"I, uh, is that supposed to take my mind off... um, itself?" he stared at the table in front of him with a look like he was trying to do long division in his head. When Ray stared at him in a way he knew meant she wouldn't drop the subject, he sighed. "He's, uh... the director?"

"Of?"

"A school?"

"Which school?"

"This... one?"

Ray grinned widely and Astrid looked incredulous. "Seriously?"

"Seriously."

"Why didn't you tell us?"

"Because I didn't really think I ever needed to." He shrugged.

"Is that even a job you can just pass on to your kid? What courses do you take for something like that?"

"A lot of them."

The girl snorted. "Are you serious, though?" she asked again, this time rhetorically. "You have to be the main character of something, your life is so... unreal."

"Yeah." He agreed.

Ray finally went silent, having run out of questions, and sipped her own warm drink as Astrid stole her tea back from Hiccup.

The trio sat in fairly comfortable silence for all of five minutes.

"So, I never really got the scoop, since Astrid whisked you away," Ray winked at the brunette across from her. "Are you guys, like, dating?"

The boy squinted thoughtfully. "Something like that? Maybe? I mean, I guess I haven't really been in an actual relationship before, so I don't exactly know how this works?" he gestured to himself and Astrid, who laughed.

Both girls looked at him like he was five and had just said something innocently adorable – which, in all honestly, he really was, and he really had. He nervously watched their expressions as they reigned in their emotions.

Astrid was the first to regain the ability to speak. "If you're okay with it, I think it's okay to say we're dating." her voice only cracked a little.

"Right, cool." he grinned. The clock above the librarian's desk read that he only had five minutes of free time left, and he shifted uncomfortably at the thought.

Ray followed his gaze to the clock and smirked. "Wow, it's almost time for you to get going, huh?"

He nodded.

She beckoned for Astrid so she could whisper in her ear and the blonde leaned across the table. "Ray!" Astrid exclaimed as she sat back down, cheeks flushed.

"What?" Hiccup furrowed his brow.

"What?" Ray echoed, smiling innocently. "It'll work, I swear. I've tested it myself. On Fisher."

The other girl rolled her eyes, but didn't look completely unconvinced.

"What's happening, what's wrong?" the boy frowned, but Astrid shook her head.

"It's nothing, you should probably get to your class." She stood, and he did too.

"Right, fun. Class."

"Uh, just... do your best." She muttered before swiftly kissing his cheek.

Hiccup stared at her for a second, bewildered, then a mischievous smile played on his lips. He pressed his lips against Astrid's quickly and pulled back with a delighted grin. "I'll try." he promised, green eyes twinkling.

Before she could respond, he was practically skipping away.

**XxX**

Hiccup chewed the inside of his cheek as he stepped out of the classroom, letting out a long breath.

That part was done.

The exams would be graded the next day, but it would be a Saturday, so he wouldn't actually see them for _three whole days._

Hiccup groaned inwardly at the thought, dragging his backpack behind him as he proceeded to his next class.

**XxX**

Everyone in Hiccup's circle of friends (and the phrase seriously delighted him, he'd never had a circle of friends before) managed quite well to keep his mind of the exams over the weekend.

They ended up going to a water park - a trip was sponsored by Rayya and Taylor - and to a fair that had come into town, and between screaming himself hoarse on twisty water slides and his brain being plagued with, "Oh, God, she's holding my hand we're holding hands this is actually happening I'm dating Astrid Hofferson what's going on?" he managed to distract himself quite well.

And then Monday rolled around.

The weekend had actually seemed quite long, it being the first in a long time the six of them had had so much fun, but it also ended much too soon.

Hiccup stood with four of his friends (Scott was insanely busy cramming everything in his textbook for his own exam, with the help of his recently appointed girlfriend) in front of the bulletin board that held his test scores. He definitely didn't want to look.

Fisher gave him a helpful nudge and he stumbled forward, finally letting his eyes travel down the page in search for 'Haddock, Harold'.

He found the name quickly and knit his eyebrows, pressing his lips together before turning to face his friends, who immediately looked downcast.

Suddenly, he couldn't keep the act up any longer and he broke into a grin, throwing his arms up. "I got an A!"

Taylor gave Ray a five dollar bill with a sigh, Fisher let out a whoop, and Astrid dashed towards him.

He met her in the middle and caught his girlfriend (okay, but he just _had _to use that word, you know?) as she flung her arms around him and squealed silently.

"You did it!" She gasped, before rolling her eyes and plainly adding, "I knew you would."

"Of course you did." Hiccup arched an eyebrow and she laughed.

"Of course I did."

Without much warning, she pressed her lips to his.

Since the invention of the kiss, dear readers, there have been five kisses that were rated the most passionate, the most pure. There have been a couple who even surpass that. The one he shared with Astrid that day would have fallen, probably, into the top twenty at most, but he wouldn't trade it for any of the others.

**XxX**

**Five Months Later:**

"Hiccup!" a voice roared from next to him, and Hiccup turned with a sigh to face his father, who held a small Yorkie – who the man had dubbed "Thornado", as it was obviously fitting. That said, the dog was known to be able to bark until your ears bled. - in his lap. The dog was struggling to get away, to stumble over its own little legs to get to the black cat who groomed himself across the room.

Hiccup rolled his eyes and knelt in front of Thornado, who stopped squirming long enough to lick Hiccup's nose.

"It's fine, Dad, just let him go. If he works off his energy before we start, maybe he'll be tired enough to sit down and be good for the actual class.

"Pushover." His dad grumbled before releasing the dog, who propelled across the floor to play with his friend.

A sudden weight fell on his head, and he poked the newcomer before lighting up and turning around.

"Astrid!" He called excitedly to the girl walking towards him, his arms spread out. Then he pointed a stern finger at her. "Stop telling Stormfly to do that." He motioned up to the bird perched proudly on his head.

Astrid rolled her eyes and called Stormfly back, then sat down in the chair next to Stoick, who found the scene quite amusing.

"Hey! Stop it, Scott!" A yell came from the corridor, and all three turned to see four new people loudly entering, as well as a turtle, who carried a little Siamese kitten on her back.

Scott was trying to topple over Fisher, who was already stumbling slightly, Rayya having jumped on his back. Taylor just cheered and laughed from beside them.

Fang darted past Taylor, after Belch, and the blond toppled over.

"Guys!" Hiccup called, and they all looked up as he motioned to the empty chairs with a sweeping gesture. "Class?"

The others still took their sweet time, but eventually they all filed in to sit in the circle around Hiccup, who surveyed his students for a moment.

They looked at him expectantly from chairs that _actually matched. _In a room that had been fixed up generously by his father, who offered to pay for the work in exchange for lessons for the little stray he had found.

Hiccup pressed his lips together and sighed inaudibly, "So, today we have a new student..."

**~END~**

**Woah so that chapter took a while, huh? Well, now I get to work on my next story! It's a Homestuck fanfic I'm kinda excited! Um, Stoick's name is still that cause I was gonna call him Stanley, but I kept thinking about that and giggling, and I couldn't finish properly.**

**I wanted to fit it in somewhere, but I couldn't figure out where, so, um... When Stoick found out Hiccup's girlfriend was _Astrid Hofferson _he told him, "Well, you better marry her, maybe she can take up the family business." Unfortunately for Hiccup, Astrid was in the room (her immediate response was "Hell yes.") **

**I named Hiccup 'Harold', cause, since his name is Horrendous, I just got Harry out of that, and you know, it went from there?**


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